SIX SECRETS TO HARMONY
By Patti Wood, MA, CSP www.PattiWood.net
Read each “secret” and give yourself quiet time to complete each one.
1. Discover What's Important. List stuff you love to do. Figure out what your needs are.
a) Self (mental, physical and creative)
b) Family and Home
c) Friends and Peers
d) Work (financial and career)
d) Community and Service
2. Make Your Harmony Happen. You have control. You are not a victim.
a) Set your goal: I will_________________________________
Starting date___________at time_____ and will continue
b) Commit to it: Put it on your wall calendar and in your day timer.
c) Seek out others to "sing" with. Get a buddy to commit to harmony.
d) Sign up for it: Take a class, such as a continuing ed course at Evening at Emory An assigned day, your money spent and commitment to a group help motivate you. Start of daily walking group, or a book club that meets at lunch. You can talk, listen together to a book on tape or share interesting magazine articles.
3. Give Your Self Time.
Stress makes you feel out of control. Remove the overstimulation from the outside world and focus on the most important being in your universe - you. Let go of the tension instead of pushing adrenaline into your system to fight against it. If you have trouble giving your self time, then get a non-ticking egg timer and set it for ten or fifteen minutes. In that time you can mediate, close your eyes, stare at a photograph or poster that has a water scene, put your hand on your stomach and breathe deeply, letting your hand rise and fall—or take a trip to the Bahamas in your mind, play with play dough, draw with crayons, flip through a magazine, walk outside.
De-stress with nature (plant, fire, and water.) Take a break at the same time each day and those times: when you have had to deal with a difficult or negative person; when you need to get some energy or motivation; when you're feeling tension or pain; When you're feeling a mental block or when you are feeling overwhelmed.
4. Create Community, Friendships and Service.
See some of the same people every day or every week or month by watching a group sport, joining a club, or service group, attending a religious service. Start exercising with others, walking the dog, going into your bank, shopping at a small grocery, having a monthly neighborhood or friend potluck, card party, or video rental night. Meet friends at a coffeehouse or bookstore.
5. Go Deep. Sometimes you need to ask your self why you are feeling a lack of harmony. What is the feeling of lack about? Analyze the emotions you are feeling and decide what they mean. Then deal with it to get through it.
a) What do I think I am missing? Am I looking in the right place?
b) What else could I make this mean? Can I look at it differently, reframe it? Am I blaming others when I am the one who needs to change? Am I complaining about a lack of balance but not taking action?
c) Is this important enough for me to spend my time worrying about it?
d) If this is really important, can I influence it in any way? What do I need to do? What is my plan? What action can I take right now?
6. Communicate What Your Needs Are.
Ask for what you need and give to others.